This Kingdom was sparsely populated, only the queen and her only
citizen, also her knight, her page and her troubadour, lived there. The queen's name was
Abigail, the page's name was Howard and I was the only spectator, or rather the listener
in front of whom the queen's page developed the chronicle of
his serving.
He had somehow chosen me to disclose the story of his life, most likely I turned up on
the Internet accidentally, and it was easier for him to share with a complete stranger. He
drew back the curtain over the stage of his life so swiftly, he painted his kingdom in
such bright colours that, without noticing, I became thrilled by the Kingdom's chronicle.
Howard had met Abigail near a swimming pool in an apartment complex in the state of
Iowa where he sat reading some technical stuff declassified by the Pentagon and Abigail
was a guest at a swimming-pool party. Abigail was the prettiest girl at the party, she
threw sun-lotion at a student going on reading, out of fun, asking him to rub it into her
back. Having caught the bottle Howard went to Abigail, carefully rubbed the lotion into
her tender skin, made an appointment for a date and at their first date he already asked
her to marry him. She answered: "Yes, but we will talk about it later" and they
had never parted since then though they married only in a year and they had never recalled
either his question or her answer.
In thirty years time the Kingdom still existed having gone through the period of rise
when Howard studied in one of the best universities of America, and then Abigail and he
moved from state to state. The Kingdom was in its prime for years when having finally
settled in California Howard and Abigail set up their own consulting company, and Howard
took part in a series of bright electronic projects. Howard's chronicles which he sent to
me to Russia referred to the period of maturity and stability which the Kingdom entered by
that time, they referred to the time of summing up, these chronicles were actually the sum
of Howard's and Abigail's bright life in their bright and happy country.
Howard wrote his first letter about his life in a spring noon having come to the office
from the garden where he cut off an Easter bouquet for Abigail, he settled down at the
computer with a glass of beer, screwing up his eyes from sun rays hitting in the window.
Howard's first letter was a hymn to Abigail: she was a beauty from the kin of well-known
diamond magnates, and famous Broadway actresses recognized her in fashionable restaurants
of New York. Abigail herself looked like a movie star, Howard said that once, leaving a
hotel in Los-Angelos during the next Oscar celebrations they had run across a crowd which
attacked Abigail with a cry "Here she is!" and having no idea whom they took her
for Abigail had calmly given out autographs. Howard's Kingdom had not become an absolute
monarchy right away: first of all he had curiously watched a slim and cheeky girl who had
flown around their first home giving him orders and being indignant if he didn't fulfil
them carefully enough, using words to which even sailors would shut their ears. Later he
appreciated Abigail's bright and quick mind, her splendid memory, business skills,
fearless resolution. More later when Abigail became a real, though informal, boss of their
company, when she started to define its strategy, having left electronic design in which
Howard was really talented, for him and their company business went up in the world,
Howard finally came to believe in Abigail's brilliant abilities and admitted her first
place both in business and in other areas of life.
The life of the Kingdom in the period of its prime was vivid and diverse. Howard and
Abigail traveled much: twice a year, in spring and in autumn they had flown to Europe,
Abigail missed the cities, the refined culture of the Old World. They had wandered about
snow-covered Vienna where happily excited Abigail was taken for a Russian because of her
sparkling furs and the high colour of her flushing cheeks; they had gone all over mountain
roads of Greece in a car, they had sat near the sea and Howard read aloud Somerset Maugham
for Abigail and having read the phrase about traveling American couples reading to each
other on a sea-shore, he started to laugh out loud and Abigail also smiled, then they felt
themselves as one unbroken team which had arrived from the continent victorious in its
young barbarity to the continent proud of its past and traditions, and it seemed to them
that they themselves had absorbed both the youth and the energy of America and the culture
and the refinement of the Old World.
Strangers seldom appeared in Howard's Kingdom's chronicles: as a real queen Abigail had
no friends, Howard was also too much engrossed in his serving to spend mental strength for
strangers. Howard and Abigail often visited a professional engineering club famous in the
Silicon Valley the members of which they have been and where it was possible to find
contacts useful for their company. Sometimes they drew together with a couple belonging to
the same circle, they often dined out together, accomplished common raids to the Beverly
Hills restaurants, then imperceptibly moved away from each other. In this club Howard
often played the piano in public: he loved music, he had perfect pitch, in his childhood
he had asked his parents to take lessons for him, but his parents could not afford music
for their both sons, they had decided to have lessons only for Howard's brother who was
going to become a professional musician, but in the last moment the brother had changed
his mind and decided to become a football teacher-coach, and Howard still had learned
music independently, his favourite piece was Hershwin's Rhapsody In Blue, sometimes he
just improvised and despite his merry and light character the sounds that the keys
produced under his fingers were doleful and sad.
Perhaps, playing, he recalled his father whom he had recently seen in twenty years time
after their parting. His father had lived in a Catholic Hospital chained to a wheelchair,
a serious surgery had lain ahead of him then and Howard had come to see him. His father
had sat motionless in his ward telling his beads, he had read nothing and even had not
watched TV, his face had lit up when he saw Howard and Howard had been astonished to see
his father after so many years, but he had coped with it, had smiled and in an hour they
had already felt themselves as if they had parted only yesterday, they had recalled old
Irish jokes, they had thought up new ones about which Abigail said later that they were
not funny: about a man going in an elevator and suddenly announcing to people going with
him that he had had clean underwear on, and they had guffawed till tears on these not very
funny jokes, and just before the surgery Howard had hugged his father and had told him
that he loved him. The surgery had passed successfully and Howard had left for home
promising his father to write; and very soon his father had been moved to a hospital in
another city in Texas where Howard's brother, the football teacher-coach lived with his
wife and four children, and the brother wrote to Howard that their father still sat the
same way in his wheel-chair and told his beads, and remembering his promise to write and
his mother's old story how his father had checked an empty mail-box every day when Howard
had left home for good being sixteen, many times Howard was about to write to his father,
but every time his letter did not go further than the first line: what he wished to tell
his father was impossible to express in words with which people wrote letters, every time
he had delayed the letter for the next day until he understood that most likely he would
not write it at all.
If he still wrote it maybe he would tell his father that their happiness with Abigail
was incomplete: they had no children despite that shortly after their wedding, on the
Christmas, they had written four names for their future four children and had hidden the
pieces of paper with these names under a high Oregon Fir tree. Since then they have had
the same big tree on each Christmas and for a considerable time yet they have dreamed that
their children would sometime run into a brightly lightened room and would look for
presents under the same tree, but time passed, one Christmas exchanged for another, but
they were still alone, and becoming little by little accustomed to it and taking it for
granted they did not visit any doctors and did not find out which of them particularly was
the reason of their common misfortune, they just accepted it as their common fate.
Glancing back at the years of his life, remembering the most important of all he has
done in the area of electronics Howard claimed that material prosperity was the criterion
of the efficiency of any person's life, he and Abigail were the bright illustration of
that -- the financial framework of their life has had firm supports and has not been
exposed to any cataclysms. In emotional and personal aspect Howard's and Abigail's life
was a continuous pursuit for perfectness of experience: having discovered for themselves
the best restaurants of London and Paris, the most elegant dresses made by Haute Couture
designers, communication with the most famous people of the world, Hollywood actors in the
circle of whom they were well received, the best movies ever made by these people a very
wide collection of which they have kept at home, Howard and Abigail had not stopped at
that point and being already in their mature age they started to study to become pilots
and having once flown over all America in a little twin-engined plane they have proved
themselves that they were capable of that too.
Their Kingdom was situated in a fifteen-rooms house the walls of which were adorned
with paintings brought by them from far away countries and cities they have visited. Their
ordinary morning started from early getting up, the first report of financial news from
the East coast, the first coffee and a brief discussion of their forthcoming attack at
American business world. During day-time Howard locked himself in his lab or left for
clients, then Abigail reigned in the Kingdom alone. In the evening they got together for
dinner, then they separated again before sleep: Howard played the piano, Abigail wrote
poems.
They both were religious, God occupied a sufficient place in their life, and though
Howard seldom visited church and treated God with some portion of Irish humour as a good
old friend, many of Abigail's poems were dedicated to her way to God which she promised
not to turn off in spite of all temptations and seductions of the modern vain and crazy
world. And though Abigail's voice rang as a small crystal bell when she read her poems
Howard knew that an iron will and a character of steel were hidden behind that tender
thrilling voice. Abigail's ancestors came from Prussia, as they did she despised both her
own and others' weakness, she could distinguish unworthy business partners as nobody else,
and if even worthy ones have had any problems Abigail preferred to step aside waiting
until they have resolved their problems themselves explaining that she was not a crutch
for others. Moved by the same arrogance towards herself Abigail did not show her poems to
anyone else except Howard, she has never tried to publish them: in her conversation with
God there should not be any witnesses who could insult or defile with their grin or a
sidelong glance holy of the holies of her soul.
This Kingdom was enchanted: time as if stopped in it. Everyday life in it was the same
as in any other ordinary State where there is neither dazzling Sovereigns nor pages
devoted to them, but both spouses were just engaged in drudgery. In Howard's Kingdom sinks
leaked, plumbing needed repairing, Howard's hair badly fell out and he swept them up with
his own hands sprinkling the floor with a special anti-static compound. But ancient
furniture in a living room reminded Howard the times that had passed long ago when these
couches and chairs had stood in Abigail's mother's house where he, a young student, had
come in cut-offs unwashed for a hundred years and he also had striven to sit on that
furniture, but Abigail's mother, a nice lady whom he always liked so much, had tried to
lead him to another room as if by chance, never letting him know that to sit on the family
furniture in dirty pants was inadmissible. Abigail's mother had been always more attentive
to him than his own mother, every birthday he had got a card from her. Many years later,
during their last meeting with her, Howard and Abigail offered her to arrange for her to
live in a mercy-house because it had already been hard for her to live alone, but
Abigail's mother said that she wished to die in her own bed, she kissed Howard and thanked
him for everything, and soon she had really died as she wished, and Howard and Abigail
inherited that same ancient furniture on which Howard has never more sat down.
Abigail did not reveal her real age even for the doctors, but from Howard's letters I
knew that she was older than he, that her health was poor, that she badly slept at night
and could not sleep at day time, that when Howard was beside her eyelids always stuck
together. Howard bitterly admitted that she ate very little, but still gained weight, that
that time she could not bear long transatlantic flights, that's why they did not travel
any more and, longing for Europe, Abigail, however, did not wish to meet fussy and noisy
people in the streets and in the stores, that's why she almost never left home. Howard
said that she felt elated only when he took her to the next charity reception or to a
theatrical premiere, then she put on a new, usually black slimming dress and really seemed
as she had been previously, and having also put on his new tie as the mayor's brother's
one, purchased for two hundred dollars, Howard escorted her to the reception and, standing
there near Abigail with a cocktail in his hand in a circle of famous in their city people,
he listened to her speeches with everyone else. And when Abigail, happy with her success,
suddenly smiled at him with her former dazzling smile Howard for a short moment thought
that something mysterious and unusual would happened in their life yet, but moments like
that have already seldom happened.
And then the revolution has crashed out in the Kingdom -- absolute monarchy in it has
suddenly turned into a constitutional one, Abigail remained a formal Sovereign, but her
real place was taken by an impostor, a woman much younger than Howard, a waitress from
their engineering club, formerly a ballerina, a beauty with radiant eyes and alluring
dancing gait. This woman's name was Gloria, a spirit of new life burst into the Kingdom
with her scattering the magic of shadows lurking in the corners. In his new letters Howard
feverishly exclaimed that he had always been rather the escort than the husband for
Abigail, that all their life she had dictated him her own conditions, to begin with
prohibiting him to appear in the kitchen to cook or to waste time in Internet. Howard said
that he would be better at home than away, but when home was not home then away was home.
At the same time he confessed that his love for Abigail has always been rather love of a
boy to a girl, but he loved Gloria as much as only a man could love a woman, he needed her
for life, for happiness, for children, for sex, for care of her and for arranging for her
home. Replying to my question for what Abigail was needed Howard said that there would be
nobody except him even to take her to the doctor and that he supposed that Abigail would
not mind if Gloria settled somewhere around and gave birth to his child.
But his new love was not especially kind to him, she has periodically left him finding
other men, more suitable for her in her life, then experiencing financial difficulties she
invariably returned and Howard gave her the money, she remained with him for a while, but
repeated that people who had seen them together took him for her father. And trying to
please her Howard has done several plastic surgeries, he cut growths on his face and
started to use a remedy from growing bald. And I was afraid to ask him about Abigail and
could not ask her myself because I knew that Abigail hated computers even more than
doctors. I imagined her sitting all by herself in a remote room of her fifteen-rooms house
and writing poems about her way to God by her calligraphic hand-writing, and having nobody
even to read them, she was putting them into her desk.
I know nothing about the Kingdom for already several years, but sometimes I still
imagine how a young queen Abigail enters the office flooded with sun-light and, having
immediately noticed the change of disposition of the things on Howard's desk, unerringly
finds a chocolate bar hidden for her under the circuit diagrams, calmly tears off the
bright foil and bites bitter chocolate with her perfect teeth victoriously meeting a rapt
gaze of her faithful page.